getting old

(1-10-04 - 4:51am)

how long have i had this tshirt?
how long have i had that idea?
have i had that same plant for 3 years?
and the spider plant?
have i had that since college?
did i carry it with me all of these years?
so much a part of me that i forget when and where and why i bought it
that i forget if i bought it.
did my mom buy that thing for me?
did i steal/borrow it from some long lost friend?
when did it happen that i became a grown up?
i wasnt paying attention and it snuck up on me.
how was i to know?
i still had some of the same clothes as i did in high school
i still had some of the same thoughts as i did in middle school
the same beliefs as whenever i had them or cared to care
all of a sudden i look in the mirror and my hair is receding
and my face looks worn and nobody cards me when i buy beer.
how was i to figure it out?
my parents still treat me the same. my sister still treats me the same.
it seems that everybody treats me the same. and i treat them the same.